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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27697057">I Hate Everything (Except Maybe You)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mizuni_no_neko/pseuds/Mizuni_no_neko'>Mizuni_no_neko</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hetalia: Axis Powers</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alfred being bratty, Alfred is a giant toddler, Alfred swearing a lot in his brain, Blanket Nests, Cuddling, Depression, M/M, No touch - he angy, Suicidal Ideations (mild)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 03:22:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,696</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27697057</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mizuni_no_neko/pseuds/Mizuni_no_neko</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Alfred is in a depressive slump, and his brain has decided he's angry at the whole world. Too bad his boyfriend's coming over to ruin his wallowing.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>America/Russia (Hetalia)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>76</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I Hate Everything (Except Maybe You)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I should be sleeping. Or at least working on something else. Oh well. Have this short little whateverthefuck. No, it wasn't edited. No, I don't care. It's not even 2k words long and it's almost 6 am. I'm not editing this shit!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The only light in the darkened room came from the TV, blaring some overwrought soap opera that the viewer was hardly paying any attention to. He was curled up in a nest of blankets, a scowl on his face as vacant eyes stared through the television rather than at it. </p><p>It was noon, but the windows were covered with heavy blankets that blocked all light and made it impossible for the occupant to know what time of day it was other than by noting what was playing on his electronic window to the outside world. </p><p>“Fuck this, I hate this stupid show.” The occupant growled, angrily hitting the power button on the remote and snuggling deeper into his nest of blankets. “Stupid fucking bitch, god Sadie's an asshole. Fucking cunt.” He snarled. </p><p>Alfred Jones was not in a good mood. </p><p>He threw the remote in the general direction of the TV, missing by a wide margin, and defiantly threw the blanket over his head. <i>Stupid fucking TV. Who wants to watch a bunch of rich people squabble over stupid shit, anyway? We should eat them</i> He thought. He hated rich people. Fuck, right now he hated all people. </p><p>“Fucking son of a bitch cock sucking <i>WHORE!</i>” He growled, grabbing a pillow from somewhere deep in his nest and shoving it to his face to scream incoherently into it. </p><p>“I hate my life, I hate myself, I hate this stupid fucking house! God, someone just fucking kill me already so I don't have to deal with this!” He screamed into the empty room, taking the pillow in one hand and bashing it a few good times on the floor. It didn't help. Nothing helped. </p><p>He was just so fucking angry, and he didn't even know why. Yeah, everything was shit all the time always, and he was a broke ass loser living all alone with no friends. And yeah, his family treated him like something disgusting, and of course he had a well of self-hatred deeper than the fucking Marianas Trench. But what did that have to do with anything? Alfred laughed bitterly at the thought.</p><p>He actually wished that he was mad because of his shit life and stupid family, but he knew that really he was just mad <i>because.</i> Because his brain was stupid and didn't work right and made his stupid <i>feelings</i> go haywire. Which only made it worse because that meant he had no fucking reason to be this goddamned angry. Just stupid fucking brain chemicals making him want to burn the whole world down just to make it stop kicking him for two seconds.</p><p>He was about to roll over and get some sleep when he heard a soft knock at his bedroom door. </p><p>“Go away!” He snapped, wrapping himself tighter in the blankets as if he could protect himself from whatever intruder had decided that his front door apparently meant fuck all. </p><p>“Alik? Are you ok?” Came a gentle voice from the other side of the door. </p><p>Fuck, it was Ivan. They were supposed to go...do something today. He'd forgotten what. Shit, he'd forgotten what day it was. Hell, he wasn't even sure he remembered what month it was. October? Maybe. Had they had Halloween yet? </p><p>“Alik?” Came another gentle prompt.</p><p>“Fuck.” Alfred swore under his breath. This was the last thing he needed right now. “Ivan, not right now. I'm fu- I'm tired.” He said, trying not to let the hostility seep into his tone. </p><p>Apparently taking that as a challenge and not an actual demand, Ivan opened the door and stepped into the room. Alfred glared at him, a low growl rumbling in his throat. </p><p>“I said, not right now.” He snapped.</p><p>“Alfred....how many pizza boxes do you have in here?” Ivan asked, looking around the dark, trashed room in shock. “And is that....what even is that stain on the floor?”</p><p>“Fuck you!” Alfred screeched flinging a pillow at him. “I didn't tell you to fucking come in here!”</p><p>Ivan sighed, easily side-stepping the pillow and coming even closer. “Alfred-”</p><p>“Go away!” Alfred snapped again, flinging himself on his side and covering himself with his blanket. “I don't feel good, leave me alone!”</p><p>There was a long stretch of silence, and for a moment Alfred hoped (but also feared) that Ivan would simply give up. But rather than the sound of the door closing behind him, Alfred felt a warm hand lay itself gently over the blankets covering his arm. </p><p>“Alik, dorogoy, what's wrong?” Ivan asked again, his voice steady and soft. </p><p>“Nothin'! Now go away!” Alfred whined, curling up tighter under the blankets and hoping his boyfriend would just fucking leave already.</p><p>Ivan hummed lightly, rubbing his hand up and down Alfred's blanketed arm. “Mmm.....no. I don't think I will.” He said, laying down on his side and drawing the nest of blankets to his chest. </p><p>“Don't touch me!” Alfred screeched, flailing around inside of his cocoon. Ivan just held on, strong arms wrapped firmly around him. </p><p>“I'm not touching you. I'm touching your blankets.” Ivan said evenly, simply drawing him closer. It was hard to fight against the warmth, and the human contact. Alfred craved it, wanted nothing more than to curl up with Ivan all day and not move. But depression brain had other ideas. </p><p>“I'll fucking murder you!” He growled, trying to twist around in his blankets and only succeeding in tangling himself up so badly that he couldn't free himself if he wanted to. </p><p>“Mmm, no.” Ivan said, nuzzling the blankets where he suspected Alfred's head was. “You don't want to go out for our date, so we'll have it here.”</p><p>“BullSHIT we will!” Alfred snarled. “I don't want to go on a date, I want to die!” He declared impudently. </p><p>“I'd be very sad if you died, though, Alik.” Ivan assured him. </p><p>“Nuh uh, no one would miss me.” Alfred huffed, pouting somewhere down in the depths of the blankets. “I'm stupid and awful and no one loves me.”</p><p>“I love you.” Ivan said simply. Alfred had no retort for that. It would be rude to tell Ivan he was wrong.</p><p>“Shut up!” He snarled instead. “Let me go!”</p><p>“No.” Ivan hummed. </p><p>Alfred let out an incoherent screech and tried to hit and scratch at him through the blankets, only succeeding in knocking himself upside the head. </p><p>“Ow! See, now look what happened! Why won't you just let me go!” He whined, twisting around to try and get away.</p><p>“Because I love you.” Ivan said, snuggling his armful off blanket taco Alfred.</p><p>“No!” Alfred whined, and Ivan could hear the pout in his tone. </p><p>“No? Alfred, are you saying you don't believe I love you? I'm hurt.” Ivan said. </p><p>“....no.” Alfred said, still petulant. </p><p>“No, you're not saying that? Then are you saying you don't love me?” He asked, gently rocking the both of them back and forth to soothe the cranky toddler in his arms. </p><p>“No!” Alfred cried, alarmed. </p><p>“Then no, what? What are you saying no to?” Ivan asked, trying to pry him out of his mood.</p><p>“.....no.” Alfred whined again. </p><p>“Saying no to no?” Ivan asked, chuckling fondly. “Is this some sort of philosophical thing?” </p><p>“Go away!” Alfred whined. </p><p>“Please tell me what's wrong, Alfred.” Ivan said, growing serious for a moment.</p><p>Alfred stilled in his blanket prison, silence falling on the two. It stretched long, hanging heavy over them. </p><p>“Alik?” Ivan asked softly after a good two minutes of nothing from inside of the Alfred roll.</p><p>“Nothing.” Alfred snapped. Then he sighed. “Everything....I dunno. Just....I don't wanna.” He whimpered. </p><p>“Don't want to what?” Ivan asked. </p><p>“Anything.” Alfred answered, sounding small and sad and muffled. </p><p>“It's okay, dorogoy. You don't have to anything right now.” Ivan assured him gently. “But please take your head out of the blankets. It can't be easy to breathe in there.</p><p>Another long silence. </p><p>“Alik? If you don't want to-” Alfred cut him off. </p><p>“I can't.” He said sheepishly. “I'm stuck.” </p><p>Ivan snorted, gently peeling back a few layers of blanket so Alfred could pop his head out. </p><p>“....thanks.” He said, barely above a whisper. </p><p>“You're welcome.” Ivan answered, burying his nose in Alfred's hair and pressing a kiss to the back of his head. </p><p>“I don't really feel like going out.” Alfred said, and Ivan could hear the exhaustion in his voice. </p><p>“We're not going anywhere, Zaika.” He said, hugging him close. “We're going to take a nap. You sound like you need it.” </p><p>“Yeah......yeah.” Alfred said, a yawn abruptly taking over him. “Do you know what time it is?” </p><p>“One in the afternoon.” Ivan supplied. </p><p>“Aw, fuck.” Alfred whined. “I've been awake for like....more than a day.” </p><p>“No wonder you're so upset.” Ivan cooed, petting a hand through his hair. “Get some rest, Zaika. I'm right here with you.”</p><p>Alfred sniffled and shifted in his blankets until his face was pressed into Ivan's chest. “You'll be here when I wake up?” He asked, voice small and vulnerable.</p><p>“I promise.” Ivan said, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “I'll be right here.” </p><p>“Okay.....but if you're not here when I wake up, I'm gonna hunt you down and murder you.” He said, pouting up at him. “I mean it, I'll kill you!”</p><p>“Well then it's a good thing I'll be here, isn't it?” Ivan chuckled. “Get some sleep, Alfred.” </p><p>“Okay.....but only cause I was gonna anyway! Not cause you told me!” He said, burying his face in Ivan's scarf. </p><p>“Of course, lyubov.” Ivan agreed. “You don't do anything because someone told you to.” </p><p>“Yer damn right.” Alfred slurred, quickly dropping off to sleep now that the excitement was over. Ivan watched with fond amusement as Alfred slowly drifted, trying to fight it like a sleepy kitten that didn't want to go to bed yet. </p><p>“Goodnight, Zaika. I love you.” Ivan whispered. </p><p>“Fuck you.” Alfred pouted, his eyes already closed. “I love you, too.” </p><p>Ivan reached over and turned the TV off as Alfred's breathing evened out. It wasn't the date Ivan had been planning on, but he was more than happy to work with this.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mood, Alfred. I'm angy, too. No touch, but also please touch. Hope y'all had fun. See you in another half a year when I actually get something done again.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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